Six months later--
It has been nearly six months since we lost Bailey, yet the pain of losing her is still within me. My husband has an electronic game which for some reason plays a little tune every eve. between 5:15 and 5:45 which oddly enough started playing after Bailey died, and even though I don't consider myself to be religious nor into psychic this or that, I have convinced myself it is Bailey letting her presence be known.
I told Dr. Sullivan that I don't think I could ever go through the process of tracking down doggie relatives for a dog needing a transplant ever again when I took Bella in April to be spade ( beagles are more susceptible than most breeds to lymphoma). My husband and daughter, Meg, thought I should let her have at least one litter of pups which because I have big concerns about the plight of too many pets already in need of good homes I was against . After discussing the matter with Dr. Sullivan I left the clinic with an unaltered dog. Bella would be allowed to have at least one litter of pups which would all have their blood tested before being given away ONLY to worthy people. Meg wants one, and though I know I will want to keep them all--impossible-- I will keep one as well.
We made it through Bella's first heat cycle--not my favorite thing to deal with. At the end of it we acquired a male puppy, an adorable tri-colored beagle who we named Cooper. Cooper is as mellow and sweet as Bella is intense and prickly : ) The plan is for the two of them to have a litter of pups. I have to say I am enjoying Cooper as a pup more than I did Bella, most likely because we got Bella just before Bailey got so very sick and died. I have never had a male dog before, but we loved Cliffy, Bailey's donor brother, so much, and I must say Cooper has captured my heart as well : )
Meg, Bailey, and went to Rockaway Beach in Oregon the past six summers. Bailey had her lymphoma diagnosis and then transplant the last two trips. Everyone who gave her attention was given a mini version of her story. I am not sure I even want to go this year. Meg just showed me the pictures of our past beach visits with Bailey which of course brought tears.
Though I love Amelia, Bella, and Cooper I am not sure that another dog and crazy as it sounds perhaps any living thing will ever match the feeling that is ingrained in me when I think of Bailey. Call it unconditional love between master and dog or maybe it is the extreme measures I took with the hope to save her. However, as I do have four grown children I don't want anyone to think that I love or care more for my pets than my own children.
As Bailey ate three of the recalled pet food brands before she died even though she died Jan. 17th and the big recall wasn't a few months later, I will always wonder if this didn't play a part in her death. Kidney failure was the beginning of her down fall. She seemed fine to me on the 14th--her blood levels were showing signs of improvement. She developed a kidney infection on Mon, looked very ill to me on Tues., the day the British photographer came to do a story on her, and died early Wed morning. I have been told by the store where I purchased the dog food that it was on store shelves as early as Nov. I don't have any clinical proof that the tainted dog food caused her death (tissue samples we had left were sent to a lab in April by her veterinarian), then again there was not another dog anywhere who had had a transplant followed by a relapse. Her immune system was already compromised.
I am trying to move on--being consumed by sadness will help no one. My goal for the summer is to finish the book I am in the process of writing about Bailey for children, and I am very interested in seeing more being done to make it easier for other pets diagnosed with lymphoma to have successful transplants. No one should ever have to go through what I did to save their dog. You know, if it would have worked I would have something to show for it--my best friend laying next to me on the couch. Sadly I don't! The next best thing is to help put something into place such as a donor registry and a cancer center in W. WA so other pet owners don't have to feel the loss that I feel as I am typing this blog entry. However, even though I am Baileyless I know that what we did will pave the way for other sick pets surive their cancer. I will never regret that we opted for her to have the transplant--HOPE is everything!
Though I am not nec. religious I hope that when my time comes I will be reunited by a little dog, who went through so much to beat her cancer. Bailey wanted to live--she was a strong willed and determined little dog. However, the vet. tech. who was with her when she died said he saw that look in her eyes--she was ready to let go. Her time had come. I just feel so very, very sad that I wasn't there with her to say goodbye.
Cathy
I told Dr. Sullivan that I don't think I could ever go through the process of tracking down doggie relatives for a dog needing a transplant ever again when I took Bella in April to be spade ( beagles are more susceptible than most breeds to lymphoma). My husband and daughter, Meg, thought I should let her have at least one litter of pups which because I have big concerns about the plight of too many pets already in need of good homes I was against . After discussing the matter with Dr. Sullivan I left the clinic with an unaltered dog. Bella would be allowed to have at least one litter of pups which would all have their blood tested before being given away ONLY to worthy people. Meg wants one, and though I know I will want to keep them all--impossible-- I will keep one as well.
We made it through Bella's first heat cycle--not my favorite thing to deal with. At the end of it we acquired a male puppy, an adorable tri-colored beagle who we named Cooper. Cooper is as mellow and sweet as Bella is intense and prickly : ) The plan is for the two of them to have a litter of pups. I have to say I am enjoying Cooper as a pup more than I did Bella, most likely because we got Bella just before Bailey got so very sick and died. I have never had a male dog before, but we loved Cliffy, Bailey's donor brother, so much, and I must say Cooper has captured my heart as well : )
Meg, Bailey, and went to Rockaway Beach in Oregon the past six summers. Bailey had her lymphoma diagnosis and then transplant the last two trips. Everyone who gave her attention was given a mini version of her story. I am not sure I even want to go this year. Meg just showed me the pictures of our past beach visits with Bailey which of course brought tears.
Though I love Amelia, Bella, and Cooper I am not sure that another dog and crazy as it sounds perhaps any living thing will ever match the feeling that is ingrained in me when I think of Bailey. Call it unconditional love between master and dog or maybe it is the extreme measures I took with the hope to save her. However, as I do have four grown children I don't want anyone to think that I love or care more for my pets than my own children.
As Bailey ate three of the recalled pet food brands before she died even though she died Jan. 17th and the big recall wasn't a few months later, I will always wonder if this didn't play a part in her death. Kidney failure was the beginning of her down fall. She seemed fine to me on the 14th--her blood levels were showing signs of improvement. She developed a kidney infection on Mon, looked very ill to me on Tues., the day the British photographer came to do a story on her, and died early Wed morning. I have been told by the store where I purchased the dog food that it was on store shelves as early as Nov. I don't have any clinical proof that the tainted dog food caused her death (tissue samples we had left were sent to a lab in April by her veterinarian), then again there was not another dog anywhere who had had a transplant followed by a relapse. Her immune system was already compromised.
I am trying to move on--being consumed by sadness will help no one. My goal for the summer is to finish the book I am in the process of writing about Bailey for children, and I am very interested in seeing more being done to make it easier for other pets diagnosed with lymphoma to have successful transplants. No one should ever have to go through what I did to save their dog. You know, if it would have worked I would have something to show for it--my best friend laying next to me on the couch. Sadly I don't! The next best thing is to help put something into place such as a donor registry and a cancer center in W. WA so other pet owners don't have to feel the loss that I feel as I am typing this blog entry. However, even though I am Baileyless I know that what we did will pave the way for other sick pets surive their cancer. I will never regret that we opted for her to have the transplant--HOPE is everything!
Though I am not nec. religious I hope that when my time comes I will be reunited by a little dog, who went through so much to beat her cancer. Bailey wanted to live--she was a strong willed and determined little dog. However, the vet. tech. who was with her when she died said he saw that look in her eyes--she was ready to let go. Her time had come. I just feel so very, very sad that I wasn't there with her to say goodbye.
Cathy
